TT BLOG

John Cadigan

@johncadigan

John talks about the last couple of days at Torquay United

I think it was the bard himself who once said – “Deep breath. Firstly, are you ok? I hope so”.

My answer? Well, bearing in mind Thursday turned out to be the day that I’ve been dreading ever since Gaming International put on their best club-killing suits, adjusted their take-advantage-of-a-sporting-venture-at-it’s-weakest hats to sit at a jaunty angle and headed down the M5 all those years ago, I weirdly, and unexpectedly, have been left actually feeling really quite positive.

I wouldn’t dream of over-dramatising the events of yesterday, but I will begin by saying that Thursday 22nd February 2024 started out as a day like any other. Piercing blue early spring skies, hazy sunshine glistening off dew-covered grass, early blossom on the trees. As I walked down to the station for my penultimate day in my current job, I seem to vividly remember noticing a woodpecker calling out from the tree tops. All in all, a perfect morning, and as I say, one I wouldn’t dream of over-dramatising. Along with the other commuters setting off on the daily grind, I jumped onto a train at 8am and settled into a seat, just in time for my phone to explode for the first time that day as Daniel Storey’s brilliant piece in the ‘I’ dropped. I watched as the numbers climbed and the anger and the sympathy rolled in, but never for a moment expected what was to come.

I actually heard rumours of something more serious being afoot at around 12.45, when a contact at the FA gave a heads up that Torquay were intending to go into administration. I didn’t really believe it, but almost before I could get a message to the Supporter’s Trust to investigate, the bombshell news had landed. Following an afternoon of confusion, conjecture and worry, I was then at my own leaving do later in the evening when the news of Gary Johnson’s departure filtered through and my phone went into meltdown for a third time. It was a very discombobulating day.

To return to the question I asked originally – how am I feeling? Well it feels like, for the first time in a long time, there is some cause for optimism and the possibility of some kind of future for the club. Of course this may all be entirely premature and completely misplaced, and we may still disappear.

But twenty four hours on, I think I’m still of the same opinion as when I first heard the news. I’m just relieved Clarke Osborne has gone. I’ll repeat that – Clarke Osborne has gone! And whilst the future is uncertain, I realised yesterday that I’d emotionally checked out of the club a little while ago. I think in my mind it was dead already. I just wanted them gone. It’s not the club I fell in love with back in 1997 and Osborne, George Edwards and latterly Gary Johnson are the reason why. Osborne in particular deserves nothing but total contempt in my eyes, and frankly I’d rather The Gulls didn’t exist at all than him get permission to do any kind of development. So yes, the fact that those mentioned above will no longer be involved has left me feeling rather chirpy.

Osborne and Edwards were always bad news. This we knew all along. But as for Gary Johnson, I’ve been so disappointed in him this season. I’ve been fortunate enough to meet and spend quite a bit of time with him over the last five years for our podcast. He was always really really good to us, interesting to chat to and so giving of his time. But the last twelve months in particular has been a very painful and unbelievably dispiriting time to follow Torquay United, and he has to take a large share of the responsibility for that.

At the height of his powers, I thought he might go down as our greatest ever manager. He was that good. But I went back recently and looked at the interview he gave after we were relegated last season, and to me the change in tone seemed to begin around then. “Love me or hate me, you’re stuck with me”. Why were we stuck with him? Why, when we’d just been relegated to the sixth tier of English football, were we stuck with him? It seems a very reasonable question to ask. His name was above the door for a season of utterly catastrophic failure. I don’t remember him being like that before and it was a real sea change in my eyes, the point where – for reasons I don’t understand – his tone changed. You don’t need me to tell you that the continuation of that attitude, the turning on the fans, the “I’m not going anywhere” arrogance, the comments about the “right sort of supporters”, has contributed to a huge amount of the ill-feeling that has made this season such a relentless misery. He’s been in the game long enough to know his time was done, but decided to prolong the agony instead. I’m really, really sad that it ended that way. That it ended in me celebrating his departure. I still don’t really understand why it had to be like that.

I am really pleased we’ve still got Aaron Downes – who is the most genuine and caring bloke you’ll ever find. I think at times like this you need as many people who feel passionately about the club as possible, and you could never doubt that with him. Just look at the way he’s fronted up this season and taken the heat that was really being directed in Gary Johnson and Gaming International’s direction. I really, really hope he makes a massive success of it.

So am I ok? Yes thanks, Holly, I am. I think overall that we’ll look back on yesterday as a positive day in the history of our club. I could be really wrong and we end up playing Brixham Villa and holding our noses at the smell of fish, but I cannot get away from the overarching feeling of relief that a particularly unpleasant chapter in our history has ended, or at least will do soon.

What’s the future holds might be uncertain, but I’ve got a feeling that better times are coming.