MATCH VERDICT
Matty Hayward
@MattyHayward96
TORQUAY UNITED 0-1 TRURO CITY – MATCH SUMMARY
Merry Christmas, your arse! I’ll pray God it’s our last.
I won’t really – it’s only football – but that two hours was plenty to dampen any Yuletide spirits that had been leftover from the big day.
The first twenty minutes of the game were it’s most shambolic. It’s no exaggeration to say that Truro could – maybe should – have scored four or five times, and it’s no surprise that their manager was doing his nut at their profligacy. A combination of sloppy passing and defensive ineptitude forced Mark Halstead into making some important, impressive saves to keep his side in it. The Chicken Wing Enthusiast also invited pressure of his own by flapping like Christ in a crucifix shop from a couple of corners. He giveth, he taketh away.
Luckily, though, as manager Gary Johnson was so keen to point out last week in the “Fans’ Forum”, we are actually very good at defending set pieces. Ok, so the one against Hemel was a blip. Ah, and the one at Chelmsford was just unlucky. We wouldn’t do it again!
We did, of course, do it again. Free header. Richly deserved lead.
It did improve from there. In fact, at no point during the rest of the game did we look like a pub team in a money-spinning cup-tie. We only looked a bit shit.
Before the break, Brett McGavin had two shots from range, one of which struck the post. The Suffolk Sergio Busquets’ strikes from distance were, sincerely, our primary credible threat all afternoon.
The second period was similarly tame, most markedly consisting of a tough-tackling, well-drilled, experience-heavy side looking pretty comfortable against a distinctly lame professional one.
It’d be wrong to say we created nothing. Archer had a half-chance on the left of the box, a searching cross looked on a plate for Ryan Hanson, and Collins struck the woodwork from upwards of 30 yards. The last fifteen minutes were largely punctuated by opportunities like this on the one hand, and incredibly naïve fouls being given away to loosen the valve of pressure on the other.
But, Truro were the better side and deserved to win. That’s Truro City.
PLAYER RATINGS
1. GK: Mark Halstead – 5
Kept us in the game at times, but also never looked comfortable. Goal wasn’t his fault.
6. RB: Ross Marshall – 4
Firstly, the game: he was non-abysmal, but also not very good. Started at right back, finished upfront.
But he’ll be better remembered for what happened afterwards. As he was walking around the pitch and clapping Popsiders, he very visibly and clearly said, repeatedly, “shut up” and “fuck off” in response to some verbal criticism. In an astonishing turn of events, those who pay the gate receipts that pay his wages didn’t take kindly to this, and levelled further abuse at him. It was this that encouraged him to walk towards said fans to continue the argument. Two or three of his teammates tried to drag him away, but he couldn’t be dissuaded. He pounded his chest and insisted “I give everything! I give everything!” – a statement which may be honest, but doesn’t detract from his evident absence of talent. It took the assistant manager, a man whose boss was nowhere to be seen, to bollock his defender and drag him away.
Of course, Ross Marshall isn’t the reason we’re the lowest ranked professional football club in England. He’s just some guy, trying to make a few quid from something that he’s been told he’s good at. But Torquay fans have expectations – not even very high expectations! Just, like, don’t get beaten at home by Truro! – about the performance of their footballers. When those expectations aren’t met, they will direct their righteous anger at somebody. He has to be intelligent enough to recognise that, swallow his pride a little bit, and toddle off down the tunnel. He certainly can’t be telling his own fans to fuck off.
23. CB: Ollie Tomlinson – 4
Mostly fine, but gave the ball away to a striker who wasn’t good enough to take a simple chance.
21. CB: Dean Moxey – 4
Again, on one leg. Someone’s got to take responsibility for our shambolic defending, the veteran captain might have to be that man.
26. LB: Archie Harris – 3
Had an absolute stinker. Truro worked him out early, and directed most goal kicks his way. The right wing back and Tyler Harvey combined to bully him out of the game. I’m not sure Andoni Iraola will be taking too much interest.
14. MF: Brett McGavin – 6
MOTM – See Below
18. MF: Will Jenkins Davies – 5
Average. Our midfield today was a massive upgrade on the one that played at Chelmsford, and WJD put himself about a bit, but he wasn’t quite good enough.
10. LW: Lewis Collins – 3
Aside from a brilliant long-range strike, it was another bad game from a player who should know better. Lost his man for the goal.
30. MF: Ethon Archer – 5
Puts himself about, and is not without talent. This is not meant as a criticism: you can see how he was shit-hot in the Isthmian. Unfortunately, he’s now playing against better players, and his lapses in passing accuracy were more glaring than his sparks of skill today.
32. RW: Osman Foyo – N/A
I’m going to be so so so generous and give him an N/A, rather than an accurate rating. There’s a conversation to be had about the worst home debuts at Plainmoor, but I don’t think it’s necessarily worth having about a young man. I’d like to see the incident again, where he appeared to push an opponent’s head into the floor after a scuffle in front of the Popside, but I felt he was lucky to avoid a red card. Then he got booked after two identical fouls in two minutes. This was before, after and during a pretty abysmal on-ball performance. It’s not his fault, but he’s not up to it, and was mercifully substituted off after half an hour.
19. ST: Theo Williams – 5
Playing upfront on your own in this team, as a short child, is a hiding to nothing. He didn’t do a lot wrong in those circumstances, but didn’t magic anything up either, and went down holding his hammy with 10 to go.
Subs
17. RW: Dillon De Silva – 4
Really harshly dropped after Chelmsford, but he was very ineffective in his hour today.
7. MF: Ryan Hanson – 4
Showed nothing, except missing a good headed chance.
2. RB: Dylan Crowe – N/A
Wasn’t on for long enough to mess it up.
Rate the TUFC Players Here
MAN OF THE MATCH – BRETT MCGAVIN
The winner of today’s tallest dwarf competition is…
I don’t think I’ve got my Brett-tinted glasses on when I say he looked mostly good today. Imperfect, but showed for the ball consistently, and at times looked like he was trying to beat them on his own. Who could blame him, really?
HONOURABLE MENTIONS
This bit always goes to the fans, now, doesn’t it? 3700 people turned up on Boxing Day, and they all deserved far better than that.
THE OFFICIALS
The usual inconsistency with cards and occasional odd call that we’ve come to expect at this level, but generally fine. A De Silva appeal for a penalty was – I think – rightly waved away.
TACTICS
4-2-3-1. The bones are so bare that Marshall was forced upfront when our only recognised striker limped off.
OPPOSITION
They’re on a good run of form, but they’re not very good. Hilarious to see James Hamon, Ed Palmer, Ryan Law and Matt Buse back at Plainmoor, playing for the better team. Tyler Harvey continues to be a limited player but too good for us.
CONCLUSION
Gary have we got to play again? I don’t think I can take I can take the pain, when we’ve got Truro away.
Call me a cynic, but I’ve got a horrible feeling that just repeating the phrase “One club, united” isn’t, actually, going to get us back into the Football League. I think it might need a deeper squad, with better players – or at least a set who can defend a corner – led by a better manager who does better coaching, under a better board. Then we might have a club that fans can unite behind!
COYY – MATTY
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